Ultimately, I decided to get serious in writing blog. After i saw my friend's blog. It was lots more better, thus I decided to redecorate my blog. Hopefully, with this new look, it will portrays and act as indicator of a new life, new style, new beginning and a new reality..hahaha... ( seriously, I don't know what I'm talking about..haha :D )
NO MORE DESPAIR!
This week was a little bid challenging and a bit peculiar. The strong feeling of jealousy that once I threw away, suddenly appeared. I felt jealous towards my friends, as they are I assumed were good in everything...chiefly in academics. It was so obvious~ during class they will consult each other, meanwhile I felt like being deserted, alienated. We were a very close and best friends. But, somehow, that moment I felt like no one care about me. I started to think that; I know that I was not as good as them, who always get an excellent result whether in the tests or examinations, whereas I am only a person who would surely be satisfied if I get the mark that I wanted~not really an ambitious one.
My lecturer once said, aim to the sky and you will fall on the tree top~aim to the highest and you will fall on a high spot; I guess that what it does mean..haha. So, he keep on telling me to apply it. Yet, I know my limit, although I totally realize that we should not thing on the negative side, yet I cannot aim too high, coz if I don't get it... I surely feel disappointed.
Only one reason that I can say of what happening. Maybe during my high school, I used to be on a quiet good-ranking students. Therefore, I never encounter such situation whereby many people were better that me, especially my best friend. Thus, now I easily felt disappointed, low-motivation, a bit sensitive and hardly accept a defeat. I could hardly control my emotion and vulnerably feeling down. :'(
But, now I realized that they were my best friends, how come a friend be jealous his own best friend; who always be there for him, cared about him, successively giving support and motivated myself every time I feel down or despair. Nothing much I can say except for I'm so sorry and thank you!! :D I'll try my hard, although I totally aware that I cannot beat you, but at least it allow me to be at least as same level as you are, hopefully.
so, never give up.. double your effort, love your friends, be kind to them, appreciate them..thanks you!! :)
"A true friend is someone who is there for you when he'd rather be anywhere else."
despairnomore~
